No Nothing

(Composed by Reynold D. Philipsek 1998 copyright Zino-Rephi Music BMI)
Vocal, guitars, drums and harmonica by Reynold
Bass by Luke Kramer
Recorded by Stymie Seamans

My favorite writer (by far) is humorist S. J. Perelman (1904-1979). In another life I will (perhaps) become a writer of that sort.

I have written a few songs where I attempt to be “funny” and “No Nothing” is one such song. It’s difficult to write humorous songs and aside from Randy Newman and Loudon Wainwright I can’t think of many who can really pull it off.

I wrote the song long enough ago that the lyric starts with “I went to see the doctor” but these days “I went to see the doctor” would be more on point.

As poet Donald Hall said aging is “a carnival of losses” and that’s what this song is all about. There is also a certain “swampiness” to the recording that I like. (This recording has the dubious distinction of being the only track I ever played drums on (or harmonica) but in both cases the part is very basic.)

Be kind.

“No Nothing”

So I went to see the doctor and the doctor said,
“Just a couple of rules to follow ‘less you want to wake up dead”

“No sugar, no sweets,
No liquor, no meat,
No fried food, no salt,

No butter you know its bad for your heart
No tobacco
And no chocolate
No soda pop,
Not one little sip”


No coffee, no tea,
No sex, you know what I mean,
No excitement and just one more thing,
Enjoy Yourself.”